What you want can be different from what you need

Call me old fashioned, call me un-punk or dis-indie-franchised, but every time I hear a new band that is achieving genius in their own little room in the world of music, I want everyone to hear, love and accept them for the genius that they are. Is it because I want to share this beauty and enlightenment, this joy that I get from listening to them? Is it because I like rooting for success for the ones that deserve it? Or is it just the plain fact that 80% of mainstream music sucks a big fat dick. And lately, popular music has been choking on that dick and puking on your lap. Call me old fashioned again, but I’m not into getting puked on. However, when it comes to bringing enlightenment to the public and cleaning up the vomit on their lap, there are a few difficulties. For starters, some people liked to be puked on and aren’t down with a nice hearty, sensual blow job. You know, maybe a little deep-throating and a swallow and smile at the end. The beautiful art of fellatio.

OK, enough with the dick-in-mouth metaphors. Some people couldn’t conceive beauty if their name was Mary and God himself impregnated them. Sucks for them. Then there’s the simple problem of taste (I could make another dick reference but I won’t). Some stuff isn’t for everyone. Please see: marijuana, homosexuality, religion, democracy, etc. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and it’s hard to please everyone. Then there’s the simple fact that some bands don’t want to be discovered. Some bands, when there in the bigger room, might not know what to do and shit on themselves. The Strokes did it, ruining their cool pants with rancid new wave diarrhea. Nirvana started to, but then got to the toilet and Kurt flushed. I just wish bands got what the deserved. All this being said, go check out White Denim. They’re from Austin, one of the coolest music scenes of the moment. They play a mash-up of genres that’s difficult to describe. They’ve got a prog-funk-punk-soul thing going. Bottom line, they can play their instruments and have a lot of soul, two things often traded for “being cool”. Give them 5 listens, minimum. If you don’t “get it” in 5, try them one more time. I guarantee you’ll at least appreciate the musical genius even if they’re not for you.

Dear M.O.F., Thank you. Signed Daniel

No, it wasn’t the most exciting, shocking, or entertaining, but dammit, it was worth every single penny to see the most professional rock n roll concert I’ve ever attend. The venue, with its 150-year-old architecture and acoustics crisper than a fresh bag of Doritos, was the perfect showcase for 3 of music’s top song writers at the top of their game coming together like a giant indie rock Voltron called Monsters of Folk. For almost 3 hours these gentlemen, dressed in full suits, served up a 4 course meal of tasty tunes from their own separate catalogs and the M.O.F. album released earlier this year. The highlights consisted of sweet, buttery ballads marinated in each singer’s unique voice and lightly kissed with a zest au guitaire acoustic. Conor Oberst sounded silkier than ever, only returning to his wounded-and-angry boy hiss that we all fell in love with on his Bright Eyes renditions. M. Ward’s sexy Leonard Cohen minus a pack a day croon stole the show on his solo outings. But Jim James stole it right back with his long-lunged southern man-angel howls. The rest was the pure fun flare of three men who loved what they do and do what they love well. This was not a “show”, it was a “concert”. Thank you M.O.F. for putting on the best “concert” I’ve ever seen.

Wal-Mart continues it's complete domination of everything, including indie music

Wal-Mart is now endorsing indie bands, labeling them as the "next big thing". The French band Phoenix is the latest. I'm all for good bands becoming recognized and popular without changing for the label or the common people or "the man", but I'm tired of Wal-Mart having it's giant dollar-sign-shaped hand in EVERYTHING. Stick to what you know best: aging "classic rock" bands greatest hits albums, Nickelback, and maybe the next Kings of Leon album. Leave the rest alone.
To view the madness, click here

P.S. This ad (and possibly this blog) brought to you by AXE HAIR

so i'm a little late on this one....

The name of the band is Battles. Their album entitled Mirrored. Their sound: the soundtrack to the manufacturing and training of a futuristic army with one agenda, total world domination. This band will make even the slackest stoner put down the Pringles and pick up a purpose, even if that purpose is to find the best weed ever (or the tastiest can of Pringles). This is the music to move a generation...in a very methodical, robotic fashion towards greatness. It's almost entirely instrumental, which may turn some of you off, but dammit give it one listen. The few vocals that are here are distorted and hard to translate. The best are the Wizard of Oz soldier chant on helium on the second track "Atlas". Put on headphones and take a walk, or do some chores, and I guarantee you'll never feel lazy or lethargic again.

French kiss some french girls

Computers making music giving you a bad feeling in your insides? Does Autotune kinda make you throw up in your mouth a little every time you here it? Would you like to french kiss some French girls? Than let the Japanroids blow the harddrives of your modern music with their huge guitar noise rock jams. They are just a murderous drummer and a guitarist with an itchy distortion petal who play arty relentless noise punk rock about liking girls. But don't worry, they're not a buncha eyeliner wearing, snifflin emo losers, or whiney pop punk pussies. These guys love to get drunk and french kiss French girls

My only beef with Radiohead

Radiohead makes some of the most beautiful music of any modern rock band on the planet. Their intelligent interstellar musings are the soundtrack of every college student's lonely nights. My one complaint is that they don't rock out enough. "Bodysnatchers", the "hardest" song on their most recent In Rainbows, is Radiohead at their best: churning crunchy guitars that squeal and moan on Johnny Greenwood's command sending Thom Yorke's vocals running for their lives. This type of fury seems to be happening less and less in Radiohead's career and it saddens me so. Please guys, if you are out there listening....rock like it's 1995 again.

The First of the Funeral

It starts like sunshine through your window on the nicest day of the year. A cool breeze of piano keys and guitar chords rustles your hair as you open your eyes to the lyrics. You get up and put on a 5 year old pair of jeans you your favorite t-shirt and walk down to the coffee shop. Then you walk back home, get into your Japanese-made car and drive. Where? You don't know. Do you care? No. Anything and everything will happen today. It's a day that religious peoples would call a revelation. It's a day where you might leave and never come back. "Neighborhood #1" by the Arcade Fire is this day every time I hear it. Funeral, the album it appears on, is a religious experience and this is the first hallelujah.